How Your Story Meets the Unknown
Story thinking can help us find our way today.
There is a special kind of earth angel whose job it is to be with the dying and help them tell their life story. The process is like a life review, which makes it sound dry — and it isn’t. It involves deeply compassionate, open listening to support a fellow human as they sift through their pot of lived experience — the good, the sorrowful, the unexplained- to dig out story gold.
At its heart, it’s a meaning making process and hopefully, a liberation.
“Stories in words are among our oldest, most powerful, most mysterious tools,” says Rafe Martin. “They give us what no other technology can — ourselves.”
A friend who does this work told me that she loves it because it allows her to sit in the presence of what she calls the mystery. That moment in a story where the magic of life reveals itself to an attentive listener. Disparate pieces link up. The call that came just as you hit rock bottom. The odd skill you learned at 20 that is suddenly needed at 40. The partner you met because you missed a flight. The childhood experience that led to a career change. I’m not saying it’s neat or tidy — it’s just mysterious.
I used to speak about the power of personal stories to restore our own agency. There is that, of course there is — and there’s more.
One of the narrative shifts climate reality is asking of us is to let go of our human-centric filters and to see everything as interconnected. I sometimes ask people I’m working with to tell part of their story from the perspective of a natural being that was there — an oak tree, a mastiff, the wind. Doing that instantly gives the story breathing space.
Seen through this lens, life is no longer a solo (rephrase: lonely) venture. It’s richly participatory. Indigenous stories remind us of this — that all living things are interconnected. They allow us to dip back into a place in our psyche we’ve become cut off from that can comfort and inspire us.
I’m reminded of this now as we sit collectively on the edge of the unknown — our world has changed, traditional paradigms are crumbling and the planet is in crisis. The writer Justine Huxley refers to these as liminal times. We’ve sailed from port with no guarantee of what our future will be. Individually, this is reflected in our personal lives. I see more clients than ever who are making work, lifestyle or place changes to align with more of who they are.
The unknown can feel scary but what if it’s exactly the ally we need right now? The more-than-just-little-old-me. Call it emptiness, like the Buddhists, or God or the Universe. Magic happens in the space beyond our rational mind and the more we can lean into this, the greater the wonders we can weave.